3.19 All We Need Is Time

The two weeks that followed were long and difficult days. Heath spent most of the time in a healing chamber alongside his dad in Moonlight Falls before he was able to go home. Exhaling Heath moved stiffly in the front seat. He felt rather than saw Don glance over at him "are you alright?" he heard him ask for the hundredth time.

"I'm fine," he replied swallowing the old familiar annoyance rising up inside him. He hated feeling helpless and weak. It reminded him too much of being trapped in the bubble universe or inside the cell with Dana. During the long days of recovery he discussed his feelings with his dad who shared many of his fears. He just wasn't ready to voice those fears with Don yet.

"Heath please," Don glanced sideways at him "talk to me." His voice came out  in a plaintive plea. He hadn't wanted to sound so needy, so weak. It was the pregnancy hormones but still there it was out in the open. "Please I can't take the silence anymore. Just talk to me. I can handle anything but the silence."

Resolutely Heath stared out the window ignoring Don's request, his plea. What could he say? That he was confused. That he needed time to sort his feelings out. Things had happened too fast. He needed time to catch up. In less than a year he had become a father of a four year old little girl he hardly knew. Fell in love with his best friend that a part of him wondered if it was real or something they were forced into by circumstances and someone else's manipulations. Then there was the fact that Don was pregnant with their second child. It was so much. Too much. He wasn't even nineteen yet and he felt he had lived a lifetime. "I just need time" he mumbled.

"Time? Time for what?" Don asked hitting the steering wheel as his frustration mounted "I've been through the same hell as you. Don't you think I feel overwhelmed too?" His voice rising "Don't you think I'm scared too?" Tremors made his arms shake as he gripped the steering wheel forcing him to pull over before he lost control of the car. Parking Don stumbled from the car.

Staring at the empty seat Heath shivered from more than the cold. He hadn't meant to say anything of what he had been thinking. Hadn't wanted to get into a discussion about his feelings. Hadn't wanted to face the fact that Don's twin sister had died trying to save him. He felt like an ingrate not appreciating the risk Don took to come for him. He had dreamed about him every night even when he had no idea who he was. He had been comforted by the kindness, gentleness and love he saw in those light beautiful blue eyes. He had clung to that and pushed Dana's advances away. What would have happened if he had been able to accept her love? Would she still be alive? Could he have been happy with her? No the answer was always no even if he didn't understand why. He would always belong with Don. Then why was he trying so hard to push him away?

Fumbling for the door handle he nearly fell from the car. Stumbling from the car he crossed his arms calling Don's name into the still cool air. He walked towards the rear of the car, stopping stunned. Don was on his knees rocking back and forth making a soft keening sound that sliced it's way through to Heath's heart. "I'm sorry" he muttered dropping to the ground beside him. He laid a gentle hand on Don's shoulder "I'm sorry" he repeated.

Looking up with tears staining his face Don said " I won't keep you shackled to me if you want to leave. You're free to do whatever makes you happy. I was...I was" he choked on his words struggling to control  his emotions "I was hoping we would be able to figure this out together."

Something melted inside Heath. He couldn't watch his friend, lover, partner whoever else he was suffer. He reached out and pulled Don close saying the only thing he knew to be true "I'm sorry. I don't want to leave. I just don't know what to think. What to feel. Will you help me?" Don slipped his arms around him, holding him tight. This time it was Heath who was crying needing support.

***

A year later Heath watched his little girl blow out her birthday candles. Five years old or the equivalent of it. She had grown so much in the time it took them to get her out of the bubble universe. Anger bubbled inside him for what Silver had robbed them of. Did it matter? Heath wished he could say it didn't but he knew he'd be lying. He wanted those stolen years back. He wanted to hold his newborn baby like he had been able to do with Lilliana.

At the sound of her clear happy voice Heath smiled. He needed to be content with what he had. A beautiful little girl. He couldn't go back and change it. All he could do is be thankful he had her and he hoped there would be no lasting side effects. "Daddy?" he turned at the sound of her voice "daddy are you alright?" Kimberly asked anxiety in her voice and bright blue eyes so much like his own.

"I'm fine princess," he said automatically.

A frown creased her forehead as she peered up at him as if she didn't believe him. "You don't have to worry daddy."

"What makes you think I'm worried?" he asked wishing she wasn't so intuitive.

She smiled sweetly up at him "you always are."

Her words echoed in his mind for the rest of the evening. After putting the girls to bed he sat on his bed deep in thought. He felt Don move beside him. Felt his hand rest lightly on his shoulder "hon it's late you need sleep. Is something bothering you?"

Turning Heath saw the same look of concern on Don's face as Kimberly had earlier that evening. He felt the corners of his mouth twitch "is it that obvious?"

"Only to those who love you" Don told him moving to sit beside him "want to talk about it?"

It was on the tip of his tongue to shove it aside. To push it away from him. Gazing into Don's eyes he knew that would only create a bigger rift between them. "I'm sad that we had so little time with Kimberly before she has to go to school..."

"She would have gone eventually even Lilliana will grow up and go to school."

Heath heard the over patient tone Don was using on him. The same tone he always used when he was afraid Heath would go off on a tirade. "This is different. We haven't had the time with her as we will have with Lilliana. Will she be alright? Are we rushing her? I'm afraid that there will be repercussions we don't know about in the future..." He felt Don pull him close till his head rested on his shoulder.

"She's going to be alright" Don soothed running his hands up and down his back "she's ready. She's bright. Trust her to know if it's too much for her."

"I just wish we had the bonding time that we will have with Lilliana. What if..."

Cupping his face Don said "we will drive ourselves crazy with what ifs. We can't change the past. We can only do the best we can with what we have now."

"What if she's...." Heath's words were cut off by Don's mouth muffling his. All other words, thoughts were momentarily lost by the heat and passion shared between them.

"We cope with things as they arise babe," Don ran his fingers through Heath's dark blue hair "you need to learn to relax. To take each day as it happens."

"I've never been any good at that," Heath closed his eyes relaxing as Don's fingers roamed his body. 

"I grew up waiting, expecting the next shoe to drop."

"I've kind of felt my life was kind of like that too" Don told him kissing a trail down his neck. His hands travelling further down.

Moaning Heath felt his body respond to Don's touch "I think you're trying to distract me."

"Mmm" Don continued his advances no longer interested in the conversation. "Is it working?" he asked lifting his mouth enough to speak before resuming kissing Heath's neck.

"Um uh" Heath wrapped his legs around Don's waist as his fingers gripped the sheets beneath him.

Grinning Don laughed as he said "I'll take that as a yes."

***

"Why couldn't we drive?" Heath asked for the millionth time.

"Relax baby flying is the best way to travel to Moonlight Falls." Don squeezed his partner's hand.

"It doesn't feel like it," Heath grumbled looking past Kimberly's head to gaze out the window hoping to catch a glimpse of land.

Kimberly looked up "isn't this fun daddy?" she asked excitement brightening her eyes. She smiled as she imitated her dad looking out the window. "I can't wait to see Grandma and Grandpa."

"Me too," Heath told her wishing he could enjoy the flight instead of thinking that the plane would suddenly fall from the sky.

Don squeezed his hand again "hey babe it's going to be alright. We'll have fun once we get there."

"I know," Heath turned his gaze from the window to Don "I know I'll have a good time just as soon as the plane touches the ground." He leaned over to tickle their two year old daughter held securely in Don's lap. "I'm looking forward to seeing Irissa graduate high school."

"You miss your family don't you?" 

Nodding Heath sighed "I've really missed my dad. It's probably strange for a 21 year old to say that but I do. For a time it had just been him and me. Even when Irissa came along it still felt like it was him and me against the world."

Don smiled squeezing his hand tighter "you have me now and it'll always be me and you against the world. There's nothing we can't handle together."

"Even flying" Heath asked as the plane rocked a bit as it hit a bit of turbulence.

"That's right babe," Don leaned over and kissed his cheek. "Close your eyes and relax. I'll let you know when we're there."

***

Heath kept glancing around the gathered crowd looking for familiar faces. "Hey babe we'll never get our luggage if you keep letting it go past," Don complained handing Lilliana to him. "Here you watch the kids while I get the bags."

Nodding Heath traded places just in time to see Kimberly point and run off yelling excitedly "it's Uncle Quentin."

Heath hung back enough to watch Quentin scoop up the girl and give the exuberant six year old a hug and kiss. "Well aren't you a sight for sore eyes?" he said after he had a moment to put Kimberly down.

"Heath it's good to see," Quentin pulled him into a hug squeezing him tight taking his breath away.

"Where's mom and dad?" Heath asked once Quentin released him.

"Dad got pulled into a meeting" Quentin rolled his eyes "the fairies are encroaching upon werewolf land. The elders are demanding retribution."

"And mom?"

"At home making sure the house is perfect for you" a smile brightened his features "don't worry so much. I offered to come and get you. She graciously accepted my offer." He looked behind Heath 

"I've got something to ask you." He fell silent shuffling his feet looking around the crowded area.

"Is it something you need to discuss in private?" Heath asked sensing the tension rising between his brother and Don as he joined them. Heath knew Quentin had opened up to Don and told him how he felt about him. It had put a strain on their friendship. So much so that Quentin left Dragon Valley moving back to Moonlight Falls where he had been welcomed back into the pack. It was an unusual turn of events but things were different now that Adam was ruler over Moonlight Falls instead of 

Alessandro. There were even a few humans moving around and mixing with the supernaturals. The world as a whole wasn't quite ready but one day maybe.

"No it's nothing like that" Quentin said running a hand through his hair. "I'm getting married." He smiled shyly as they congratulated him. "Will you be my best man?" He asked "you're the only family I have and...."

"Of course" Heath told him "just tell me where and when."

"Right here in Moonlight Falls. Now that I'm part of the pack again I never want to leave. Reggie's ok with living here."

"Reggie?" Don asked "you don't mean that guy..."

"The one and only" a deep voice said from behind them. Don turned somewhat surprised to see the halfling who had helped them. "Don't look so shocked. It's not like you wanted him. I know a good thing when I see it." He winked at Don before moving to stand beside Quentin.

Heath heard the unmistakable rumble coming from Quentin and suppressed the twitching of his lips that threatened to lift into a silly grin. He brought a hand up to hide the grin that was slowly spreading across his face. "It's nice to meet you Reggie."

Sticking his hand out Reggie grinned at him "no need to hide the pearly whites. Quentin needs to learn to relax. Isn't that right wolfie?" he said turning to his mate.

Quentin met his mates beaming face with a scowl that eventually lifted into bemusement. "That's why I have you Reg. You never take anything seriously."

"Oh but I do," Reggie countered "I take you very seriously. Why else would I have asked you to marry me?"

"I was kind of wondering that myself. All you do is flirt with every guy you meet." Quentin said eyes narrowing as a low rumble began deep in his throat.

"But I always come home with you" Reggie gave him a cheeky grin. Quentin only growled deeper. Shrugging Reggie stepped back and took his mates hand and placed it on his stomach "I only tease. There's only one person I love. I can't help it your a grumpy grouch. Your the father of my baby and any other children we might be blessed with in the future."

Heath stood back watching the by play between his brother and fiance. A wave of jealousy swept through him. He wished his and Don's relationship was like that. Turning his head he looked at Don and wondered if there was something wrong with him that Don hadn't even hinted at wanting to get married. Maybe he thought it was bad enough they had two children together. Was that what was keeping them together? The kids? Turning back to the happy couple in time to see them lip locked in a kiss Heath sighed wishing it were him and Don in that happy state of affairs.

"Dad can we go now?" Kimberly asked growing tired of the baggage claims area.

"We'll be going just as soon as Uncle Quentin is done..."

"Swallowing that mans face," Kimberly giggled watching them "you and daddy should do that." 

Heath felt his mouth drop open as he stared at his daughter. Then he looked over at Don who was still struggling with all the luggage. "Um uh maybe we should" was all he could come up with to say.

"I highly recommend it" Reggie interrupted bending down he gave Kimberly a serious look before asking "will you be our flower girl?"

Turning to look at her dads for approval she nodded "will I get to wear a pretty dress?"

"With sparkles even" Reggie told her much to her delight.

"Like a fairy princess?" she smiled up at him as he nodded at her. Squealing she gave him a hug. "I think I'm going to like you very much Uncle Reggie." Running up to Heath she excitedly asked "can I be the flower girl when you and daddy get married?"

The question hung in the air until Heath swallowed hard nodding "sure princess when your dad and I get married you can be our flower girl." He watched her excited prancing around wishing he was as sure as she was that day would come. He refused to look in Don's direction as he followed Quentin and Reggie to the exit. He was thankful that Quentin hadn't asked him any questions but he was sure Quentin would corner him at some point in their visit. What he wouldn't do for a little alone time with his dad. He needed a little advise before his world fell apart again.