4.3 I Want You To Stay

Kimberly stared at her reflection, frowning at what she saw staring back at her. Unremarkable was the only word she could fine to describe herself. Mousy brown hair, average blue eyes. Not one thing stood out screaming for attention. She set her eye liner aside with a loud sigh. "No amount of makeup will make me pretty."

"You're too hard on yourself," her Dad said inside her head. She wasn't surprised that he had responded to her cry for help. It was normal for him to do so. Just as it was normal for her to turn to him when she couldn't cope with a particular situation.

"You have to say that," she complained.

"I wouldn't say it if it weren't true," Heath told her "besides it's pointless to lie when you can read my mind when we're connected like this."

That lifted her spirits some. She could tell if he was lying. She didn't very often connect with anyone else in the family other than her dad or grandpa. Not sense she learned the lesson of the importance of privacy. She had the unfortunate mishap of telling every about Gwen's secret crush. She never wanted to betray someones trust like that again. It had taken Gwen months before she would talk to her again. Kimberly smiled at her reflection "thank you Daddy."

"You're welcome sweetheart," Heath chuckled a little "you don't have to compare yourself with your cousin. You don't have to be beautiful to everyone."

"I know Daddy," she looked down feeling shy as her cheeks started to burn as her thoughts turned to Malachi. He never failed to make her feel beautiful.

"When will I get to meet Mr Wonderful?" Heath asked breaking into her thoughts.

"I don't know maybe Spring Break."

"Wouldn't you rather go someplace fun with your friends? You don't really want to come home and be with your boring old parents, do you?"

"You're not old or boring," she objected "besides Malachi would love meeting you."

"Then I'll look forward to seeing you then," Heath told her "I'll let your Dad know. Would you do me a favor? Give him a call sometime. He's getting jealous of how easy and often we talk."

"I will Daddy. I promise," Kimberly assured him. She regretted that her relationship with her other Dad was so strained compared to what she shared with Heath. She knew Don wasn't comfortable with her getting inside his head. So much so she no longer attempted to connect with him that way.

"I love you sweetie. Good luck on your date."

Her date. She was going to be late for her date. She brushed her hair one last time before running from the house.

***

She walked into the mostly deserted coffee shop. Her eyes darting around looking for the dark haired green eyed boy of her dreams. She found him sitting alone his nose in a book. "This seat taken?" she asked coming up beside him.

Startled he jerked upright the book falling to the floor with a loud clatter. "I thought you weren't...I mean you're here," he stammered as his face turned several shades of red.

Kimberly knelt to retrieve the fallen book. Smoothing the crumpled corners she murmured "I'm sorry."

"You're here now that's all that matters," he told her taking the book, their fingers brushing each others. "Would you like something to eat?" he asked "my treat." He got up and moved towards the counter.

"Um" she hesitated looking at her options trying to pick something she hoped he could afford.

"Don't worry about the cost," he whispered in her ear.

Startled she looked up to find him staring at her "how did you...."

"Poor college student remember?" he attempted to wink at her but she noticed the flicker of worry in his eyes before he turned to order two apple danishes and two mocha cappuccinos.

"Pretty confident I'll like what you ordered," she said in a mock serious tone.

"Well," he looked down a little less confident then he was a few moments before "I know you like anything apple and you never pass up chocolate."

She covered her mouth with her hand trying to hide the silly grin she knew was there. "Am I that predictable?"

"No ... that cute," he said looking down fiddling with his napkin "I've never seen anyone get as excited as you do over caramel apple suckers."

She couldn't hold in her giggle any more."I can't help it. They're my fav candy ever!"

"I'll keep that in mind" he smiled at her while his eyes still looked worried.

"Is something wrong?" she asked noticing that he seemed a little off.

"It's nothing," he shook his head looking away.

"Are you sure?" she asked squeezing his free hand.

"Um uh....it's nothing. Really it's nothing," he attempted to give her a smile that faded half way.

She gave him an unconvinced look while she nodded "if you want to talk I'm here."

"I know," he mumbled "would you like to go for a walk?" he asked gathering her empty plate and cleaning up their refuse.

***

That night after Malachi walked her home she felt restless. She stared up into the night sky hoping the answers she was seeking were hidden somewhere in the stars. Despite his denial she knew something was wrong. She could see it in his eyes. Feel it in the way he rubbed his thumb along her skin when they held hands. What wasn't he telling her?

She didn't know how long she stood staring up at the stars but long enough for her to grow stiff and cold from inactivity. Sighing she moved to the door, gasping in shock catching sight of her cousin and her half naked date making out on the couch.

Gwen looked up with a half angry smirk upon her lips "you could have knocked."

"I live here," Kimberly grumbled moving towards the stairs averting her gaze. She ran up the stairs unaware that Gwen followed her until she tried to close her bedroom door.

"So did he tell you?" she demanded.

"Tell me what?" she asked turning to face her cousin.

"He didn't, did he?" she asked almost gleefully "it's all over campus that he lost his scholarship."

"Who?" she asked even as she asked she knew. She saw the heart breaking sadness in his green eyes and the worry. She shouldn't have let him pay.

"You know who. Malachi" Gwen spat at her.

"Why are you so angry at me?" Kimberly asked trying to keep herself calm.

"Because I'll have to stay here and take care of your heartbroken pathetic self when I could be out having fun..."

"I don't need a babysitter," Kimberly told her trying to keep the wobble from her voice. She hated that about herself and how her voice would break under strain. "I can take care of myself."

"Well at least I offered," Gwen said backing towards the door.

"You didn't offer," Kimberly snorted "you whined in the hopes I would turn you down. All so you wouldn't have to feel bad for not helping."

"Whatever," Gwen shrugged unconcerned.

"We're not finished" Kimberly said moving to block her escape "what happened to the rules?"

"What rules?" she glared at the dark haired girl.

"You know," Kimberly crossed her arms leaning against the door "the one where we don't make out in common areas like the living room."

"Oh that," she shrugged "you weren't home..."

"So you thought it'd be ok," Kimberly couldn't believe what she was hearing.

"It's not like I haven't done it before," she laughed at her cousin "you're such a baby."

She hated to admit it but Gwen was right "I would appreciate it if you would keep it to your room from now on."

"Sure, sure just for you," she winked at her "you'll change your mind once you do it."

"Maybe," she said already doubting it. Casual sex didn't appeal to her as much as it obviously did to Gwen.

A few minutes later she heard Gwen and her date come upstairs. She could hear Gwen giggle but not what the guy said in response. "Not so loud we don't want little miss innocent to hear us."

"That's right your cousin's still a virgin isn't she?" Kimberly reached for her ear buds seeking to block them out what they were saying when she heard Gwen say loud and clear "you know anyone up to the challenge?"

"There's plenty who wouldn't mind getting a piece of that action," was the rather hurtful and insulting response. She turned up her music hoping to drown out the rest of the conversation and the moans of pleasure that would soon follow. She had no doubt that conversation was pitched for her benefit. 

***

The next day Kimberly waited for Malachi to come out of the Fine Arts building. She watched him emerge, head down, feet shuffling. "Malachi," she said as he passed by where she sat. 

He stopped looked around in a kind of daze "Kim, what are you doing here?"

Ignoring his question she asked "why didn't you tell me?"

He stared at her befuddled "tell you what?"

"You lost your scholarship," she got up and wrapped her arms around his waist "why didn't you tell me? Don't you trust me?"

"Of course I do," he leaned his forehead against hers sighing "why would you ask that?"

She looked into his sullen green eyes "why did I have to hear about it from Gwen? Why didn't you 

tell me?"

"How did your cousin find out? I was working on a solution. A way to stay in school," he looked away before continuing "I thought if I managed to figure things out then I wouldn't need to worry you. I would have told you if I failed. I just needed time to figure everything out."

"Maybe I could have helped if you had told me," she pointed out leaning her head on his shoulder.

"I'm sorry. I'm used to doing things on my own." He pulled her towards the bench she had sat on waiting for him "I almost have it figured out. I'm going to have to work twice as hard but it's doable....almost."

"Almost?" she looked up at him "tell me please."

"I can't afford student housing. I can barely  afford to eat." He meant it as a joke but the worry he saw in her crystal clear blue eyes he knew his attempt fell flat.

She turned her head to the side as if listening to something. "Ask the boy to live with you and Gwen. 

You have an extra room," her dad suggested.

"Are you serious?" she asked "won't Dad be upset?"

"I'll talk to him," Heath told her "don't worry about it. I'll take care of it."

"Thank you Daddy," she blinked clearing her mind. When she opened her eyes she found Malachi staring at her intently with concern.

"Are you ok?" he asked "you blanked out there for a moment."

"No I'm ok I...." she bit her lip unsure how he would taker her ability to communicate with blood relatives with her mind. It was something she would have to tell him sooner or later. She would prefer it be later though. "I was just thinking. We have an extra room and your piano is already set up there. Why don't you live in our house? I mean .... that is if you want..." She clamped her mouth shut over the words that wanted bubble out like an uncorked bottle of champagne. She could feel her hands becoming clammy as he stared at her "well say something..."

"I..." he cleared his throat looking away face bright red.

"I'm not proposing marriage or anything. We can still be...you know. We don't..." her face turned almost violet as she choked on the words that almost spilled out. "Oh gawd I'm such an awkward idiot."

His chuckle was almost as bad as his silence had been. He reached out and gently turned her face towards him "no you're not. You're many things but idiot isn't one of them. At least not to me." He leaned in and placed a light feathery kiss upon her lips. "Thank you for the offer but I don't think it'll work out."

"Why not?" she demanded grabbing his hand afraid he'd walk away.

"I don't think your dad's would want your boyfriend living in the same house as you," he told her.

"Yes they would...I mean they wouldn't mind," she sighed as she saw the disbelieving look he had on his face "I'll ask them. I'm positive they'll say yes."

Brushing a loose strand of hair behind her ear Malachi gazed into her blue eyes "ok ask. Just don't be surprised when their answer is no."

"It won't be because their answer will be yes and when they approve it,  will you promise me that you'll move in?"

"I promise" he said pulling her close.

***

"No freaking way" Gwen glared at her hands on hips.

"It's not your decision," Kimberly said bracing herself for more verbal abuse She wanted nothing more than to have her best friend back instead of this clone masquerading as her. "Gwen our parents approved it. What's your problem?"

"If your boyfriend can move in so can mine," she said.

"What boyfriend?" Kimberly asked confused "you haven't dated or slept with the same guy more than once since we got here."

The blonde's eyes bulged from their sockets "how dare you."

"How dare I what?" Kimberly choked "tell the truth?"

"You called me a whore," Gwen accused tears running down her cheeks.

"If the shoe fits," Kimberly tossed back regretting the words as soon as they were said. The sudden stinging slap on her cheek left her stunned. The sound echoed in the silent kitchen. Gwen stared at her hand then moved her wide stunned blue eyes to the reddening bruised cheek of her cousin. Without a sound Gwen whirled around and ran from the house.

Kimberly crumpled to the floor crying, desperate to keep her mind closed so as not to alert her parents to what happened. She didn't want to be the one to break the news to her Uncles about their daughter's downward spiral, at least not yet. She would if there wasn't any other way to break through to Gwen.

"Are you alright?" a concerned male voice asked coming into the kitchen.

Looking up Kimberly held a hand over her sore cheek mumbling "I'm fine."

"Liar" Malachi said as he knelt beside her. Taking her hand away "let me see."

Looking down unable to meet his concerned green eyes "she's just upset....I said things I shouldn't have."

"Maybe this isn't such a good idea. I don't want to cause conflict between you and your cousin," 

Malachi said wiping away the tears as they rolled down her face. "I can find someplace else to live. Tell your parents thank you for me." He stood up and turned to leave.

"No please," Kimberly grabbed his hand "I want you to stay....please."

Looking down at her he let her pull him down to the floor with her. He pulled her into his arms kissing her cheek "ok you win. I'll stay."

"Thank you," she murmured snuggling into his arms resting her head on his shoulder "she's not mad at you. She's mad at me."

"Why?" he probed wanting to help but unsure how or whether he should become involved.

Shrugging "I don't understand her anymore. I want the girl I grew up with back but I don't think she exists anymore and I miss her."

"Have you tried telling her how you feel?"

"I don't know how," she sighed sitting up in his arms "every time I try we wind up saying things to hurt each other."

"I'm sorry," Malachi said softly "I don't know what else to suggest."

"It's ok" she smiled up at him "thanks for listening."

"Want to help me move my stuff in?" he asked looking for something to distract her.

"Oh so now you're putting me to work," she gave him a severe frown "do I look like I do manual labor?"

"Now that I think about it...."

"Don't say it if you value your life," she advised him putting a hand to his lips "I'll help."